Outcome: "Win"
Record: 104-7
Streak: Won 7
Summary: Today I got up leisurely, did my morning pages, performed my morning toilette, ate, went grocery shopping, made my lunches for next week, cleaned up, did a bit of laundry, did my 45 minutes of AW, next I'm going to do an hour of "b", then read my AW for next week, read my ass off until Eva gets home, and then chillax. I'm reading a French grammar text, and there's a chance that I'll finish tonight, which would be glorious.
Regarding your challenge Dan...I'm thinking about it. I'll let you know definitely in tomorrow's post. I don't even have enough ducats to buy you a raspberry mocha, but maybe I could save up for a while before we meet up next time. Dude, a 5 for me is a 5 for you, I'm pretty sure. I would say even if you leave the house a minute late, you don't get a 5. My 5 is a fascist 5. You can't be out of step even in the slightest detail. Like my breech of silence would certainly warrant failure. Not getting up absolutely promptly and crisply would result in failure. Lingering the shower on a tired morning for even a minute would result in failure. Any little thing. Are you up for that? I might be up for that. I'll have to let you know tomorrow.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Friday, January 19, 2007
Outcome: "Win"
Record: 103-7
Streak: Won 6
Summary: Today, at least so far, has been a blow-out win. Viewers might have turned off their TVs because it's not even competitive.
I did my morning pages in excellent fashion, ate a great breakfast, biked to work quickly to make up for leaving the house a minute late (I did get there on time), worked hard, weighed in at 172, did 15 minutes of French, worked more, biked to the art supply store to pick up supplies for class, organized my school shit, made a deposit, folded/hung up some laundry, cleaned the bathroom, cleaned up the kitchen, completed my French lesson for the week (it was a super-long one), and made dinner. After dinner, I will write some letters, go on my artist's date, make a grocery list for tomorrow, and perhaps put in some time on AW exercises.
I want to tell the story of the raspberry mocha. For the whole week I have been intensely craving a raspberry mocha. I don't know why, but I was. Because I'm really trying to push my fitness goals to make up for the holidays, I decided that I'm not allowed to have one this week. However, despite my resolution, my mind was screaming for one from the second I walked in on Monday until I clocked out this afternoon. Well, fuck you mocha--I won. Here's my challenge for next week: break 170. Keep in mind, last year my end goal was 180. I've already surpassed that by 8 pounds, which is great, but I still feel slightly fat-fuckish so I need to keep going.
This Sunday I'm going to have an intense relaxation session. I will have completed every task for the week, so I won't feel guilty or anxious. Just relaxing. I've already said, I'm not driving anywhere Sunday. And since football is over, things will be even-keeled.
I'm flirting with the idea of demanding 100% perfection from myself next week. I've already talked about perfectionism and its crippling effect, so in a way I think it's bad to make such a goal. But then again, this week was near perfect, and perhaps I could look at it as a game, and if I don't do it, then it's still OK, because I can get a win without a 100%. If I did it, that would mean 7 straight 5s. Can you believe that shit? The 5 was mythical last year. Achieving my first one (last year) took such a monumental expenditure of energy that I recall crashing and stopping my system the day after. This year I've gotten a handful of "5s", without being annihilated by them. But 7 straight? Wow, that would be out of hand.
Record: 103-7
Streak: Won 6
Summary: Today, at least so far, has been a blow-out win. Viewers might have turned off their TVs because it's not even competitive.
I did my morning pages in excellent fashion, ate a great breakfast, biked to work quickly to make up for leaving the house a minute late (I did get there on time), worked hard, weighed in at 172, did 15 minutes of French, worked more, biked to the art supply store to pick up supplies for class, organized my school shit, made a deposit, folded/hung up some laundry, cleaned the bathroom, cleaned up the kitchen, completed my French lesson for the week (it was a super-long one), and made dinner. After dinner, I will write some letters, go on my artist's date, make a grocery list for tomorrow, and perhaps put in some time on AW exercises.
I want to tell the story of the raspberry mocha. For the whole week I have been intensely craving a raspberry mocha. I don't know why, but I was. Because I'm really trying to push my fitness goals to make up for the holidays, I decided that I'm not allowed to have one this week. However, despite my resolution, my mind was screaming for one from the second I walked in on Monday until I clocked out this afternoon. Well, fuck you mocha--I won. Here's my challenge for next week: break 170. Keep in mind, last year my end goal was 180. I've already surpassed that by 8 pounds, which is great, but I still feel slightly fat-fuckish so I need to keep going.
This Sunday I'm going to have an intense relaxation session. I will have completed every task for the week, so I won't feel guilty or anxious. Just relaxing. I've already said, I'm not driving anywhere Sunday. And since football is over, things will be even-keeled.
I'm flirting with the idea of demanding 100% perfection from myself next week. I've already talked about perfectionism and its crippling effect, so in a way I think it's bad to make such a goal. But then again, this week was near perfect, and perhaps I could look at it as a game, and if I don't do it, then it's still OK, because I can get a win without a 100%. If I did it, that would mean 7 straight 5s. Can you believe that shit? The 5 was mythical last year. Achieving my first one (last year) took such a monumental expenditure of energy that I recall crashing and stopping my system the day after. This year I've gotten a handful of "5s", without being annihilated by them. But 7 straight? Wow, that would be out of hand.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
Outcome: "Win"
Record: 102-7
Streak: Won 5
Summary: This morning was another time when I almost went back to bed after turning off the alarm clock, but I triumphed again. I've basically been sticking to my schedule perfectly so far this week. Class seems good. It's additional time and money, but it's worth it. I weighed in at 173 today. It's great because ever after all the holidays and stuff, I'm right back to where I was before.
There was a classic example of breech of silence today. I was in a group of my co-workers, and one of them said she was going to Trader Joe's. She asked me if I wanted anything. In response, I said, "Well, there are definitely things I want, but I shouldn't because I don't have any money." That was completely unnecessary, and beyond that, it was unethical. First of all, I shouldn't complain about my situation, ever. Unless I feel wronged and expect my grievance to redress the situation, I shouldn't complain. I view what I said as an indirect complaint. Also, no one needs to know about my financial status, and not just for my privacy, but for their own sake as well. It's pathetic and annoying. The proper response would have been, "no, but thanks for offering."
Record: 102-7
Streak: Won 5
Summary: This morning was another time when I almost went back to bed after turning off the alarm clock, but I triumphed again. I've basically been sticking to my schedule perfectly so far this week. Class seems good. It's additional time and money, but it's worth it. I weighed in at 173 today. It's great because ever after all the holidays and stuff, I'm right back to where I was before.
There was a classic example of breech of silence today. I was in a group of my co-workers, and one of them said she was going to Trader Joe's. She asked me if I wanted anything. In response, I said, "Well, there are definitely things I want, but I shouldn't because I don't have any money." That was completely unnecessary, and beyond that, it was unethical. First of all, I shouldn't complain about my situation, ever. Unless I feel wronged and expect my grievance to redress the situation, I shouldn't complain. I view what I said as an indirect complaint. Also, no one needs to know about my financial status, and not just for my privacy, but for their own sake as well. It's pathetic and annoying. The proper response would have been, "no, but thanks for offering."
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Outcome: "Win"
Record: 101-7
Streak: Won 4
Summary: I'm posting early because I want to go to bed promptly after returning from class. One of my books still hasn't arrived, which is annoying, and I also spent time trying to deal with that, which messed up my schedule a little bit. I did my morning pages and followed my principles, I'll probably get at least 20 minutes of AW in before leaving, and class counts for my "b" time for the day.
Record: 101-7
Streak: Won 4
Summary: I'm posting early because I want to go to bed promptly after returning from class. One of my books still hasn't arrived, which is annoying, and I also spent time trying to deal with that, which messed up my schedule a little bit. I did my morning pages and followed my principles, I'll probably get at least 20 minutes of AW in before leaving, and class counts for my "b" time for the day.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Outcome: "Win"
Record: 100-7
Streak: Won 3
Summary: 100 wins feels good. It simultaneously feels like it was a short time and a long time. I did my pages, ate breakfast, biked, worked, studied French for 15 minutes, logged a few extra minutes at work, biked home, did an hour of GRE, did AW exercises for 45 minutes, cooked an epic dinner (I'm still working on it--fried sage and winter squash soup), and after this I'm going to finish dinner, eat, make my lunch, do my nightly dental stuff, and then go to bed. Tomorrow I start classes at AACC.
For my AW exercise I have to create a collage with images of myself next to images representative of my ideal life, and specifically, of what it would be like if your dream came true. So tonight I printed out pictures of Terri Gross and Fresh Air interviewing someone in the studio, took pictures of myself, printed those out, and then cut them and taped them onto the Fresh Air pictures. I made a photo sequence, and it's hilarious.
Record: 100-7
Streak: Won 3
Summary: 100 wins feels good. It simultaneously feels like it was a short time and a long time. I did my pages, ate breakfast, biked, worked, studied French for 15 minutes, logged a few extra minutes at work, biked home, did an hour of GRE, did AW exercises for 45 minutes, cooked an epic dinner (I'm still working on it--fried sage and winter squash soup), and after this I'm going to finish dinner, eat, make my lunch, do my nightly dental stuff, and then go to bed. Tomorrow I start classes at AACC.
For my AW exercise I have to create a collage with images of myself next to images representative of my ideal life, and specifically, of what it would be like if your dream came true. So tonight I printed out pictures of Terri Gross and Fresh Air interviewing someone in the studio, took pictures of myself, printed those out, and then cut them and taped them onto the Fresh Air pictures. I made a photo sequence, and it's hilarious.
Monday, January 15, 2007
Outcome: Win
Record: 99-7
Streak: Won 2
Summary: Normal stuff. Strategy worked. Great moment this morning: alarm went off, I felt like a truck had hit me, I capitulated in my mind--I actually decided to let myself go back to bed. I stood up, shut off the alarm clock, and almost commenced a shameful beginning to the week. Then miraculously, I got up and started working. Hell yeah.
Record: 99-7
Streak: Won 2
Summary: Normal stuff. Strategy worked. Great moment this morning: alarm went off, I felt like a truck had hit me, I capitulated in my mind--I actually decided to let myself go back to bed. I stood up, shut off the alarm clock, and almost commenced a shameful beginning to the week. Then miraculously, I got up and started working. Hell yeah.
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Outcome for 1/13: "Loss"
Outcome for 1/14: "Win"
Record: 98-7
Streak: Won 1
Summary: Yesterday sucked and that's the end of the commentary for yesterday. Today I was impressed with my ability to get back on the horse. I did my morning pages, created a dinner menu for the week that should be fun and increase my culinary knowledge, went shopping, made my lunches for next week, studied GRE for 2 1/2 hours, read my AW lesson for next week, and soon I'm going to get into bed.
Weekly Summary: My mind completely rebelled against myself Friday and Saturday. Well, more like my emotions rebelled. My head just went ape-shit. Perfectionism was frothing and rampaging in my mind Saturday, which contributed to my loss. I thought of a new idea. I am a perfectionist. I would like to solve that problem, and I would be better off if I was able to, but in the meantime, perhaps I can channel it. This is how I propose to channel it: I divide myself into two minds. In the one mind, I am the "coach", Andy Reid. In this mind I create schedules, to-do lists, and strategies, using what I know to be effective and humane principles. Then I turn myself over to my other mind, or the "player" mind. In this mind I am emotional and passionate. In this mind, I allow myself to be a perfectionist, that is, I challenge myself to follow perfectly the un-perfectionist game plan that I created as a "coach". It worked today, because today I tried it.
There were some interesting comments about discipline that the author of Artist's Way Made concerning discipline, comments that are relevant to our discussion about virtue. However, I want to wait to see how my own projects pan out before I post them, sort of as a test.
Outcome for 1/14: "Win"
Record: 98-7
Streak: Won 1
Summary: Yesterday sucked and that's the end of the commentary for yesterday. Today I was impressed with my ability to get back on the horse. I did my morning pages, created a dinner menu for the week that should be fun and increase my culinary knowledge, went shopping, made my lunches for next week, studied GRE for 2 1/2 hours, read my AW lesson for next week, and soon I'm going to get into bed.
Weekly Summary: My mind completely rebelled against myself Friday and Saturday. Well, more like my emotions rebelled. My head just went ape-shit. Perfectionism was frothing and rampaging in my mind Saturday, which contributed to my loss. I thought of a new idea. I am a perfectionist. I would like to solve that problem, and I would be better off if I was able to, but in the meantime, perhaps I can channel it. This is how I propose to channel it: I divide myself into two minds. In the one mind, I am the "coach", Andy Reid. In this mind I create schedules, to-do lists, and strategies, using what I know to be effective and humane principles. Then I turn myself over to my other mind, or the "player" mind. In this mind I am emotional and passionate. In this mind, I allow myself to be a perfectionist, that is, I challenge myself to follow perfectly the un-perfectionist game plan that I created as a "coach". It worked today, because today I tried it.
There were some interesting comments about discipline that the author of Artist's Way Made concerning discipline, comments that are relevant to our discussion about virtue. However, I want to wait to see how my own projects pan out before I post them, sort of as a test.
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